Here Goes The Down Spiral

My life continues to be a frustrating emotional roller coaster.
I broke the screen on my Fujifilm digital camera, I accidentally shut it in my friend's car door... Yes, I am that brilliant... I can still use it but I went, and got a new one, I just need rechargeable batteries for it.... I recently put a scratch in my cellphone screen, it fell in the ditch out of my pocket when I went out... Another smart move...
I lost a contact lense. I don't even know why I have them sometimes I just have them, lose them, barely wear them, and occasionally forget to put the solution in, and they dry out... I hate glasses, but they are safer to wear then contact lenses most of the time...
I don't know what is fake, and what is real anymore... I really don't know what to do with myself... I have break downs at least once a week for several factors. Including stress, among other things...
I always go into a huge down spiral once a year, but I was saved once upon a time. But that person will never be able to save me again...

Happier Note:
The wedding, and reception I attended was lovely. Since I have never been to a wedding before I didn't know what to expect. I am really happy for the lovely couple. ♥ So beautiful. The ceremony wasn't as long as I thought it would be, but it was still amazing, and the Reverend who taught my Religion course when I attended Mount Allison did a perfect job.
Bach's Jesu, Joy of Our Desiring. ;-; So beautiful...

Puella Magi Madoka Magica

Favourite Mahou Shoujo: Mami Tomoe, and Madoka Kaname.
Favourite Witch: Charlotte.
I started this series off, and was hooked the moment I started. I love Mami's character, and her death was unfortunate. I love her western style outfit design, and personality.
I liked Madoka because as useless as she was for the entire series, minus the flashbacks I knew there was something about her. I love her personality, and typical Mahou Shoujo dress design.
Charlotte is my favourite witch because she is so cute. I also love the speculation about her.
This series put a crazy twist to the Mahou Shoujo genre, and I loved it.
I highly recommend it to anyone who likes the Mahou Shoujo genre, or anyone who likes genres twisted.

Still Rather Frustrated

I am still rather frustrated about work, and them cutting my hours.
They have done it again today, and it wasn't as bad. I finally have my shifts for this week, and that is kind of alleviating some of the stress I have.
I feel like I don't fit in, and most of the time I just want to disappear. I hate that feeling. I do like some of the people there. Some of them are nice to me. ♥ I believe some of them would be great friends.
There was some fun at work today. We were all singing along to Taylor Swift's Love Story, and a few other songs on the radio. It was fun.
I've been so distressed, and there is only one person I want to talk to. I just don't want to be the one to start the conversation. I hope they start talking to me soon.

Falling Into More of a Mess

Once again, I have been cut hours, they sent me home three hours after my shift started. Who the hell schedules 23 people to work over lunch?! Send home the whiny little high schoolers who complain about that job, because it's oh so hard. They just hired more people too, I understand the high turnover rate, but a lot of people can't even handle the first few days. I still don't have my schedule, and I asked for it this morning, and I got a I will get it for you, and bring it out, and for the three hours I was there I never got the damn thing! Liar. I promised someone back home that I wouldn't cry at work up here, and I did. All be it no one seen it, or noticed, but I still failed to keep that promise.
My friend was right I can't do the crew trainer job, because I don't understand it, and I don't know what it is, the same with management. I will forever be unhappy at my current job.
I called Dad, and I get stop crying, and do what you got to do. No one cares.
I went to the mall later, I had to find a dress to wear for my friend's wedding that I will be attending. I found one thankfully, and I love it. I also got one of those candied apples I love so much. It was so busy in the mall, and it's only Easter for goodness sake! I had also gone grocery shopping right after work for some much needed food.

So I Will Keep Smiling Regardless of the Pain

I've had two days off, and what did I do with them? The same thing when I went home, nothing. :D Yes I am still going on about that.
Well actually I have all my things up here so I can do things I suppose, but it is still pretty boring when you have no friends.
So I am back into watching anime again, oh well, it's kind of a hobby, and it kills time, plus it is a huge inspiration for me as well. I started watching Puella Magia Madoka Magica, it's such a dark twist on a magical girl story. Love it! ♥ I also finished it because all the episodes have been released. I love the characters Mami Tomoe, and Madoka Kaname.
My left knee bothered me for most of the day Thursday for some reason. I haven't done anything major to it, just the normal hit it off stuff occasionally by accident. Not going to worry about it.
I am silently proving that my friends back home really don't care about me, no one talks to me, I always start conversations on msn, very few people send me texts. It is actually really depressing because I feel so alone up here, and it has been like this since I moved, and before then.
I just have to smile, and push along like nothing is wrong.

Issues With Work

Dizzy spells that almost lead to fainting, and migraines.... Falling back asleep when I know I have to work with less than an hour to get ready. I am doing so good!
I used to love my job (keywords: used to) until a major staff change over within the managers, and it is happening again where I am now, the store manager was promoted, and the staff change within managers is about to occur...
I don't feel like I fit in at this store at all, I don't even really have any friends at this store, I don,t think anyone likes me anyways. A few things were said to me by a friend back home, and I just don't even want to work at McDonald's anymore....
McDonald's has a huge turnover rate, and is the lowest of low being a Fast Food Restaurant...
In the last two days I have been cut five hours because they have been sending me home early since we have been dead!
I can't get a job right now either because everyone is hiring for management, and I don't have the experience. I'll also never get into management because I don't know what it is....

A Very Uneventful Weekend Home

I went home Thursday night, the bus was pretty much empty to my liking. :)
I must say the temperature plummeted after Thursday night though. :(
I always stop at McDonald's first, and watching my former co-workers sometimes is so funny. It was nice to see some people though. I had a lovely fight with Mochi, my one year old cat who did not want to get out of my room. He was fighting back, I couldn't even pick him up to get him out the door so I pushed him along. Mochi really likes bags, and will lick the inside of Wal-Mart ones.... Weird cat.
I went to do Income Taxes Friday morning, and I forgot my papers in my room, so we had to turn around, and go get them, we were late but it was better than us getting to H&R Block, and remembering then. I went into McDonald's again, and I seen my old boss... And he hasn't changed. I met up with a friend that night, and met up with more later. We did Karaoke, our Friday night tradition.
I was going to go out Saturday night but I decided not to, and watched Jurassic Park 3. I never went to the Market, even though I had planned on it. I never go anymore.
I am back on Animaritime staff.
I got the bus driver on the way back I don't particularly like.
I went into work tonight, and my schedule was not in the book, and that was just stressful. They gave me the manager's schedule to copy it down from after looking for it. I just wish it had of been ready for before I left Thursday night. I also went in, and found a new hat because mine has disappeared.
Sunday I helped my Father grocery shop for my mother. Ugh, hate doing that.

It Comes, and Goes

I now make regular random posts on Tumblr. HERE! Forget it, it's an addiction!
Sat, and watched a real thunderstorm accompanied by heavy rain the other night, it was beautiful.
Had a few self issues, and now the normal parental issues with my mother....
I gave up three hours of my shift today so that I could go have breakfast for a friend I never get to see. ♥ I love her so much, she's such a strong person, someone I aspire to be like. Burger King does amazing breakfast! I had no idea. I also went with her when she ran errands. It was a lot of fun.
Work has been work. I don't think I am going to get any higher. It is disappointing, and makes me cry.
My glasses are driving me crazy! They feel like they are going to fall off my face! Time to wear contacts more often. (Still wants circle lenses, specifically grey).
Going home this weekend, and I am super excited. :D I have been since I booked the time off a month ago.
In general my moods come, and go, kind of like the ocean tides.

Eventful

The rest of that order finally came in so now I have City of Fallen Angels which I am now reading. I am also reading/watching Pandora Hearts, watching Kaleido Star, and Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon. Pandora Hearts was an adventure to find the first volume of the manga in Chapters. If ever something is hidden that I am looking for in a store I shall find it, in this case that one volume.
Work has been work, very busy, and what not. We had corporation come in Friday so for the last two weeks we have been cleaning like crazy. It has been fun though. We actually get advanced notice about these visits unlike the other store I worked at where we got the notice two days before. It was amazing though. I worked on Saturday which I hardly ever do.
I am going home this weekend, and I am supper excited. I get to do income tax, and all that lovely jazz. See friends, hang out with friends, do things that I miss, go places, ecetera. I have to work all week before I go home though, but it is going to be worth it.
I got to just hang around with my roommates one day after work, and it was so much fun, we had so much fun. We had a rather unpleasant experience with the downstairs tenant. Someone dropped an iPod on the floor, around eight-thirty in the morning, and the tenant came upstairs banged on a window, and proceeded to enter the house because no one answered the door. Me being me, I was terrified, and did not move an inch. This tenant will be out when the lease is up. After this we all went to Tim Horton's, and talked about it. The landlord is such a big help. Our door doesn't close properly so we can lock it but it might not be closed so we have a bolt now.
I am also working on beating the Phoenix Wright game series, it has been a while since I intially started playing it but I need to beat it.

It's Snowing Again!

I occasionally do rash things, and they are usually bad. I got a call from Chapters tonight, half of my order came in... I really actually want the Mortal Instruments book more than Sakura Hime but that is okay. I checked the weather, and it said light rain so I just threw on a hoodie, and ran out the door. I didn't even get to the end of the street, and it started to snow. I also ended up throwing my phone in the ditch. So talented right? This was at night when I had already been at the mall for something to do earlier during the day.
I love my Dad, I call him too much possibly. He was playing Pokémon when I called. ♥
I am trying to finally finish playing Phoenix Wright series, this might take a while. I still also have to get further in Pokémon Black. I started watching Kaleido Star, and I am absolutely in love with it.
Will this gaping void ever heal? I still care for my first ex-boyfriend. I would do anything to have him back but he won't take me back.... Ugh.

An Eventful April Fool's Day

I adore my roommates, it is down to the three of us now. Yesterday I was talking to one of them in the kitchen, and we mentioned the other one so she came out in the hall, and said: "I just heard my name." It was so funny, and cute. I think we are going to have a blast this summer. :) Our landlord is amazing as well, she is so sweet.
We had a freak snowstorm yesterday, and I barely made it home from work. I couldn't even walk two metres without rolling either one my ankles, and when I was almost home I fell on my face. I had an umbrella with me, and it didn't really work because the snow was coming down sideways due to the wind. Haha, very funny mother nature...
I had a fun day at work, it was all smiles. I spilled a cup of cream over on one manager, and threw a water bottle at another one. All of this by accident of course. I seen the spilling the cream coming though. Someone completely got me with an April Fool's joke. They said bus ticket prices would go up since gas prices went up. I totally fell for it, yet I caught on a few moments later.
No joke here, seriously. I broke up with my boyfriend, I couldn't see it happening. Also the zodiacs that we are both aligned under clash to much.